A Troll in Silk is a Troll No Less

To paraphrase Rodriguez, the man of the moment, A Troll in Silk is a Troll No less and if you are committed to reaching or maintaining a healthy weight, it is essential you know this. Sometimes trolls also wear pretty dresses and warm smiles but if they apply pressure on you to eat or drink something you don’t want to, in my book that makes them a troll. And, forgive the mixed metaphors, but just like Rumpelstiltskin, you have to name them, if only in your own mind, to take back your power.

I am pretty resolute when it comes to what I will or won’t put into my mouth but just last week I experienced the power of the troll. The troll is the one who makes you feel bad because you aren’t joining in in what they are eating or drinking. The greater power the troll exerts on your life (the example that is top-of-mind is a work colleague that I need on my side), the harder it is to refuse.

The trickery is in the way in which trolls behave. They hide beneath the bridge and just the moment you are about to cross it they threaten you with pleas like “Oh, go on, have a glass of wine,” or “Stop being such a stick in the mud, a little piece won’t kill you,” or “Just taste this!” or “But I made this especially for you”. These are some of the ways trolls behave. I don’t believe they know they are trolls nor the quantum of pressure they exert upon us but these are the people to watch out for. The boogieman is not under the bed, she is at the table with you.

Here’s what I’ve learned:

1) Nobody who loves or respects me will want me to break such a life-affirming commitment (to stay healthy) and if they do, it proves they don’t love or respect me.

2) It is possible to refuse even the most insistent person by asking them not to put pressure on me to eat something I don’t want to.

3) You could (I haven’t yet, to be honest with you) identify the trolls behaviour. In my mind’s eye I’ve said things like: “The only reason you are putting pressure on me to join you is so that you don’t have to be the only one drinking or eating junk at the table – if you want it, enjoy it, but leave me out of it.” I can’t really see myself saying that to someone who has power over me but I can and do think it and that makes it easier for me not to capitulate.

4) A psychological truth is that what drives me crazy about people is also something I do myself. So, let me place the following on record. I get so much pleasure from baking that despite the evils of sugar and carbs I will continue to do it and continue to offer it to my guests. I offer what I bake to everyone, even if they’re on a healthy eating plan, and I will continue to do so as, for me, it is an expression of my affection. Happily though I don’t mind a jot if you refuse.